Morrison's Magical Menagerie
by MamaStreet
Summary: Just a cute dialogue story. Steve is trying to order pizza and calls a pet shop instead.


"Morrison's Magical Menagerie. How can I help you?"

 **"Oh, I'm sorry, I must have dialed the wrong number."**

"No worries. If you were trying to get Rizzetti's Pizza they're 5289. We're 5288."

 **"Got it. Sorry to bother you."**

"Not a problem!"

* * *

"Morrison's Magical Menagerie. How can I help you?"

 **"Jeez, I did it again? Sorry. I was trying to call Rizzetti's."**

"Don't worry about it. Enjoy your pizza!"

* * *

"Morrison's Magical Menagerie. We do not recommend purchasing live bunnies and or ducklings and or baby chicks for your child's Easter basket. Please stick with chocolate."

 **"Wait? People actually do that?"**

"Unfortunately. How can I help you?"

 **"Oh, um, sorry. I was actually trying to call Rizzetti's."**

"Most people would have fixed the number in their phone by now."

 **"Yeah, well… I have a cell phone for work, but I still use a land line at home."**

"Huh. That's kind of charmingly old-fashioned. We have an old rotary phone here at the shop that's never been disconnected. We keep it because the ringer's loud enough to be heard over Voldemort."

[A screech is heard in the background followed by a raucous voice calling, "Avada Kedavra! Avada Kedavra!"]

 **[light chuckle] "I guess there's never a dull a moment in your shop…Oh, my friends are here. I need to order that pizza."**

"I guess you do. Enjoy your pizza, Charming!"

* * *

"Morrison's Magical Menagerie. How can I help you?"

 **"Good morning."**

"Hey, Charming. It's a little early for pizza, isn't it?"

 **"I actually called you intentionally this time, Morrison's. I need a birthday present for a dog."**

"Ok. What did you have in mind?"

 **"I have no idea."**

"Well, we have plenty of normal dog stuff – chew toys, leashes and collars, fancy treats. Although, I'm guessing it's a pretty pampered dog if it's getting a birthday party. What does the dog like?"

 **"Pizza."**

"Shocking, as often as you order it."

 **"He's not my dog. That pizza's usually just for me."**

"Oh. Well, tell me about the dog."

 **"He was originally owned by the mafia. Then my friend found him. He's a mutt, missing one eye. Name's Lucky."**

"Wow. Lucky indeed."

 **"He's certainly special."**

"How about a monogrammed sweater?"

 **"For a dog?"**

"You said he was special."

 **"You know what, why not? Let's order a monogrammed sweater."**

* * *

"Morrison's Magical Menagerie."

 **"You sound tired."**

"Hey Charming. How'd Lucky like his sweater?"

 **"Loved it. Refused to take it off, even after he'd rolled around in the pizza box."**

"Must have been some party. Well, make sure and tell your friend to wash it on cold or it will shrink."

 **"Will do.** **You, uh, sounded a little off when you answered the phone. Is everything ok?"**

"Oh, yeah. It's just our slow time of year, so things get a little tight. I was trying to work some magic with the bills."

 **"Sorry about that. Why is it slow this time of year?"**

"The weather's warming up, so vets start telling their clients that the little bit of weight Fluffy's put on over the winter needs to come off. So treat sales go down. And there's no more big holidays coming up."

 **"Maybe things will pick up."**

[a piercing screech interrupts]

"I gotta go. The Dark Lord is ready for breakfast. Bye, Charming."

[dial tone]

 **"Well at least Darcy's cultural education sessions are paying off. I understood that reference."**

* * *

"Morrison's Magical Menagerie. How can I help you?"

 _"Hi! I'm calling from the shelter on East 68_ _th_ _Street. A donor is supplying a couple months' worth of food for our more medically fragile residents. Is that an order you could fill?"_

"I'll sure try. You can email the prescriptions and I'll order the food today."

 _"Great! Do you deliver, or do we need to pick it up?"_

"I'll send you a confirmation with a delivery date and time. It should be next day after I receive the shipment."

 _"Perfect! Thanks so much!"_

"No, thank you! Or thank your donor!"

* * *

"Morrison's Mag – no, Alex, wait!"

 **"Morrison's?"**

[a muffled curse, a metallic screech, heavy breathing, more cursing]

"…wait for me next time! [panting] Morrison's Magical Menagerie."

 **"Everything ok there, Morrison's?"**

"Oh, hey Charming. My friend thought he could clean Kaa's cage by himself. Kaa disagreed."

 **"I know this one. Kaa's from the Jungle Book, so he must be a snake, right?"**

"Yep. Ball Python, hundred pounds. He's kind of a beast to get back in his tank."

 **"Right, I noticed him on Saturday."**

"Were you in the store? You should have introduced yourself."

 **"It, uh…it was kind of busy."**

"It sure was. Best Saturday I had all month."

 **"Well that's good, right?"**

"Yep. It was weird – somebody was giving away Avengers pictures and autographs down on the corner if people showed their receipt from the shop. [laughs] I thought maybe Alex had set it up with his theater friends, but he denied it. Can't complain though – had some great sales."

 **"[laughs] That's certainly unusual. Maybe you have a superhero benefactor."**

"The whole street should have them. Me and the schwarma place were the only shops with minimal damage when those aliens attacked. The animals were really traumatized, though. One of the cats got out when their window was broken. Captain America brought her back. That was cool – cats are really hard to handle when they're upset."

 **"Maybe he likes cats."**

"I would have pegged him as a dog person – dogs are good at hero worship."

 **"I don't know. I think you'd get a little tired of the hero worship after a while. Cats are affectionate, but still independent."**

"Sounds like you're a bit of a cat person yourself."

 **"Yep. But I travel too much with work to have one now. Maybe someday."**

"Did you need anything, Charming?"

 **"Oh – yeah. I was going to order some dog treats for Lucky. I'm going to be watching him for a couple days."**

"That's nice of you. Why don't you bring him by and he can choose his own treats?"

 **"Umm…I don't know if that will work. I'd better order some and then we'll see."**

"No worries. I'll do up a variety box and send it to you. Any allergies?"

 **"The dog lives on pizza. I'm sure whatever you send will be fine."**

"Gotcha. COD again?"

 **"Is that ok? I know credit cards are more normal, but…"**

"Special customers, special privileges."

* * *

"Morrison's Magical Menagerie. Please make sure you keep your pets inside and safe during the fireworks tonight!"

 **"Hey, that's a good reminder!"**

"Hi, Charming. Happy Independence Day!"

 **"Same to you."**

"What can I do for you?"

 **"Actually…I intended to call Rizzetti's. Sorry about that."**

"You're breaking my heart, Charming!"

 **"It's, uh, it's Steve, actually. My name's Steve."**

"Oh. Well, hi, Steve. My name's Laurel."

[ _"Steve! Legolas says to make sure you get one with double pepperoni for Lucky!"_ ]

 **"I'd better go. Enjoy your fourth, Laurel."**

"You too, Steve."

[dial tone]

 _"Did you invite her over?"_

 **"No."**

 _"Be honest, Cap. Are you ashamed of us?"_

 **"Since we're pretty much the most dysfunctional family ever, yeah a little bit."**

 _"You really wound me when you say things like that."_

* * *

"Morrison's Magical Menagerie. Please ensure your pets have access to plenty of drinking water during this heat wave. If you think it's hot, they do too."

 **"That's another great reminder."**

"Hey Steve! You calling for me or Rizzetti's?"

 **"You this time. My friend, Nat is standing here and threatened to shoot me if I didn't call you."**

"Sounds like an interesting friend. Why did he or she want you to call?"

 **"She.** [murmuring in the background] **And she says that I am supposed to tell you that when I called on the fourth of July I was calling to invite you to my birthday party, but I chickened out and said I was trying to call Rizzetti's instead. I maintain that part could have been an honest mistake because I needed to call Rizzetti's anyway.** [murmuring in the background] **And you're the first almost-friend I've made that's not work-related, and I wussed out on you, and I'm sorry. What does that even mean?** [murmuring in the background] **No, Nat. You've already made this awkward enough, don't…** [scuffling]

"Steve?"

"Steve, what's going on over there?"

 _"Steve would also like to ask you out on a date to get coffee or meet up in a park or whatever, but he's too much of a chicken to do it."_

"Oh, I'm guessing this is Nat?"

 _"Yep. And Steve is cute and sweet, but can be a little socially awkward, which is why he didn't introduce himself at your store, or invite you over the other night."_

"Oh, well, that's ok. I'm kind of better with animals than people myself."

 _"So, will you go out with him?"_

"Oh! Um, sure. Yeah, there's a little coffee shop called Perc on the corner here. Is that convenient? I could be there at 8:15."

 _"Great."_

[dial tone]

"Well that was…unexpected."

* * *

"Morrison's Magical Menagerie. How can I help you?"

[loud rushing wind noise] "IS THIS LAUREL?"

"Yes. Can I help you with something?"

"MY NAME'S TONY. I WORK WITH STEVE. LISTEN, SOMETHING CAME UP AND HE CAN'T MEET YOU TONIGHT. WE'LL RESCHEDULE. CAIO!"

"Wha…?"

[dial tone]

* * *

"Morrison's Magical… [screeching… _Crucio! Crucio! Crucio!]_ Voldemort if you don't shut up I'm going to Incarcerous your beak shut…Morrison's Magical Menagerie. We are currently having a special on one African Grey Parrot that may or may not survive the week."

 **"I'm going to pass on that one, thanks. He probably wouldn't get along with my future cat."**

"Oh, hey Steve. How was the work thing?"

 **"Exhausting. Sorry about having Tony call. He was the only one with…uh…hands free at the moment."**

"No worries. And listen, if you felt pressured by your friend or whatever, you don't have to…"

 **"No! I'd…I'd like to talk to you in person. I mean, Nat was right, I don't have any friends outside of work. How about tonight?"**

"Sure, that would work. I close at 8:00, so I could be at Perc just after."

 **"Great! I'll see you then, Laurel."**

"Bye, Steve."

* * *

Steve Rogers sat hunched in a corner in the small coffee shop at 7:55, trying to hide his large frame under a leather jacket with a ball cap pulled low over his eyes. He watched the door, trying to talk through various scenarios in his head, alternately explaining why he hadn't mentioned that he was Captain America, and hoping she didn't even recognize him as such.

The clock ticked by…8:00…8:05…8:10…8:15. Her shop was just a few doors down, he could easily swing by and see if she was on her way. That wasn't a big deal right? He walked quickly down the street and stopped outside the door of Morrison's Magical Menagerie. The words were painted in an old-fashioned script arching over the large window where a few kittens tumbled about or snoozed contentedly. The lights were still on, though the Closed sign hung in the window. Steve peered inside, only to suddenly hear a crash and a long metallic scraping sound coming from the back. He tried the door, but it was locked. A brief yell and some grunting came from inside, and the super soldier couldn't hold back anymore. He shouldered his way through the door, pulling it completely off its hinges and stopped in surprise to see Laurel cursing and trying to remain standing under the weight of a huge snake.

"Hey! What did you do to my door?!"

 **"Laurel, what…what are you doing?"**

"Alex didn't close his lid properly, and he doesn't [pant] want to go [pant] back in his tank. Hey, come help me lift him in the middle."

 **"Uh, sure."**

"Wait…easy there…he's nice…just…huge."

 **"Ok, listen…just let me…look I got this…really."**

"Thanks [pant] so…why'd you break my door?"

 **"You were late and I heard noises, and…I'm Steve."**

"Oh, wow. Well, thanks for helping. Good thing you're so strong…because you're…Steve…as in Steve Rogers…as in Captain America aren't you?…That's…unexpected."

 **"Yeah…Do you…uh…still want to get coffee?"**

"As soon as you board up my door. And don't think I'm not going to make you pay for that just because you helped with Kaa."

 **"Wouldn't dream of it. It's uh…it's nice to meet you in person, Laurel."**

"Nice to meet you too, Charming."


End file.
